5 ways to better DAD

       “We physically miss absent mothers, but subconsciously deteriorate from absent fathers.”-

My good friends at Playground Dad recently released an article, “The Expectant Dads Guide to the Hospital Bag” recently and it made me think about some lessons we as fathers, need to have in order to be the best we can for the little ones depending on us.  The following are a few tips and lessons that I’ve learned.

1.       Be a better father

This always presents a constant challenge for me because I felt that my dad was perfect.  He was always there for me, and was just a genuinely good man.  I’ve failed at this, but I’ve learned and continue to learn to be better.  Set the bar high for your child, and they will always remember the example you’ve set.

2.       Time is Important

I’ve told you this in a previous blog, but quality time is as important as quantity of time.  I’m guilty of sitting on my laptop, trying to become better, while my son wants to play with me.  When I put it down and play with him I see his eyes light up, and I also experience a deeper relationship.  Even if it means that we have to stay up late to get work done, spend quality time with your kids.

3.       Keep your word

I can’t honestly say I’ve always done this in life, but when it comes to my child I’m challenged with this on a daily basis.  Children, like women, have an uncanny ability to remember small promises.  If you tell your child that you will be at that game, play, party, etc then make sure you move heaven and earth to do so.  Unlike adults, children have a difficult time understanding a broken promise, and may eventually expect nothing but broken promises.

4.       Show Love

Children are programmed to love, play, and eat.  They will naturally depend on mommy for all of those.  As fathers we have to put in extra work in order to gain that dependence.  If we don’t make the effort to show them that we are as reliable as their mothers they will find reassurance/love elsewhere.  Most of our sons turn to gangs and street life, while most of our daughters seek it from any man or woman that will show it.  Let real love start at home, and they will know how to spot the counterfeit when they see it.

5.       Lead by example

Once again, I have failed at this, but I’m learning and growing.  If you’re honest, you’ve failed too.  Leading by example has nothing to do with being perfect, but more to do with being honest about whom you are.  Show your child that you are imperfect, but that you are growing.  Being honest, and leading them as you grow, allows them to know that although they may struggle there’s hope for them as well.   Let them see you doing school work.  Let them see you in the kitchen.  Allow them to hear you praying for forgiveness and wisdom for your Heavenly Father.  Your child will appreciate that their father is strong enough to admit his mistakes, but also wise enough to improve.

Just me